Hi, Just a guy that is stuck -

My heart goes out to you.

Without knowing anything about the specifics of your situation, here's what I'll say. The end of an affair constitutes a loss of an important, meaningful relationship. Even if the relationship wasn’t “kosher” or “supposed to happen” or whatever, happen it did, and all of the feelings you experienced for that person were/are totally legitimate… and you can’t necessarily extinguish all of those feelings, even after the relationship has ended. I suggest honoring those feelings when they show up, and allow them to be an indication that you shared something important with another person, something that was significant to you as the human you are – even if the relationship was illicit. And perhaps allow yourself to grieve for the loss of what you had with that person, if you haven’t already.

It sounds like you may have some questions about whether or not you want to be in your marriage at all, and that's a little harder to address here. If you'd like to talk, you can schedule a free consultation with me through my website - mariemurphyphd.com

Good luck and all the best.

Marie